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Monday, June 3rd, 2002

Subject:HURT......
Time:6:37 am.
Mood: crushed.
I thought that everything was going great... till yesterday. I found out that Dylan went to Kate's house right after leaving mine, he was there like the whole night I guess. I thought that we might of had something no matter how small that it might be. I guess that I was wrong. I also thought that he cared, I must have been wrong about that one to, but Kate says that he does. If he tells me that he does, I know that I am going to want to believe him, but people tell me not to. Sam tells me to tell him to Fuck off. Though there is something in me that won't allow it. It may be that I care/d about him a lot. I cried myself to sleep last night, because this has never happend to me before and it really really hurts.

Sam talked to Dylan last night:
Sam says:
Hello?

Dylan says:
hi

Sam says:
This is Sam

Dylan says:
I know...how are you?

Sam says:
Kind of angry.

Sam says:
How could you do that to Sarah?

Sam says:
And Kate?

Sam says:
Sarah is soo hurt. She did nothing to deserve this. She's practically crying.

Dylan says:
I agree...
I followed impulse, and let things happen by moments that I should've avoided...
thereby acting like a total asshole

Sam says:
You have no idea what you did to Sarah. And you know, the amazing this is... she still wants to talk to you. After everything you've done to hurt her.

Sam says:
I told her to tell you to fuck off.

Sam says:
You lied to her.

Sam says:
I told Kate to do the same.

Sam says:
You don't deserve either of them.

Sam says:
That's how I see it.

Dylan says:
That's probably a good call
I never meant for any of it to happen.
You have no idea how terrible I feel.

Sam says:
I'm glad you feel terrible, you should. And of course you never meant for it to happen... you thought they'd never find out.

Dylan says:
How could they not?
That's the thing...I wasn't thinking.

Sam says:
Obviously. There are no excuses though. You fucked up and now you're going to have to pay for it.

Sam says:
I think you're a cool guy but you hurt my friend and that hurts me. I'm sorry but that's just how it is.

Sam says:
Especailly since she did NOTHING to deserve this.

Dylan says:
I realize that reconciliation is probably not an option at this point, but if there's anything that I could do, I wouldn't hesitate.
I don't expect anyone to believe me...but I want all involved, Sarah especially to know that I'm sorry.

Sam says:
Tell her, not me.

Dylan says:
I intend to when I get the chance.
I thought you should know too...if it matters

Sam says:
I don't want to hear your apologies.

Sam says:
The only reason I care is because Sarah's my friend.
Sam says:
I don't like seeing her like this.

Sam says:
Anyway, I hope you have a miserable night. I have better things to do.

Dylan says:
okay then...take it easy

It's great to have friends like her! all that i have to say is..FUCK IT ALL. I would like to say that i knew what was going to happen next but i don't. lifes a big FAT UGLY BITCH!
vintage pose

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